


God Only Knows

by cinelitchick



Category: The Exorcist (TV)
Genre: Anal Fingering, Anal Sex, Angst with a Happy Ending, Exorcisms, Fluff and Angst, M/M, Oral Sex, Sex, Temporary Character Death
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-03-25
Updated: 2019-04-19
Packaged: 2019-12-07 16:51:29
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 12
Words: 18,031
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18237632
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/cinelitchick/pseuds/cinelitchick
Summary: An unexpected event occurs during an exorcism, driving a wedge between Marcus and Tomas.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> This is a follow-up to "The Trials of Tomas Ortega" and is set shortly after that story ends. While not a direct sequel (think of this as book 1.5), it is set in that universe. This can be read as a standalone, although reading the previous story is always recommended.

The room inside the three-story townhouse had gone cold not long after the two men entered. It was a disaster area even with all the furniture removed, minus a bed and a ceiling fan light. On the twin-sized mattress, blood and urine stains covered the narrow square. A stench sucked the air out of the space making the men gag. It was a vile odor that came from severe decay.  

Small and slight was the body that had been tied down. The same could not be said of its voice, which filled the room and shook the house to its foundations. It came from a young boy, no more than twelve. He had coppery hair that was short on the sides and long on top. A _Steven Universe_ T-shirt and blue jeans covered in blood, mucus and other bodily fluids adorned him.   

His name was Micah Matthews. He had been bullied unrelentingly for most of the school year. It had gotten worse somehow after the Christmas break. Every day, he came home in tears. His parents had tried to intervene, but the school administration and the board of education had proved useless.  

Micah had become more withdrawn over the past few months. His mother had overheard him having several one-sided conversations. His father had found him cutting the inside of his forearm. The dogs were the final straw. Both were at their wits’ end when the feral canines started showing up.  

Micah’s mother nearly cried when the two men — one younger, with a dark curly head and full facial hair, and wearing black pants, a matching shirt and a white priest’s collar; the other older, a dark blond with less facial hair and wearing a black T-shirt and skinny jeans — appeared on her front doorstep three weeks ago.  

His father didn’t want to listen to what they had to say, but his instincts told him they were right. He and his wife were both practicing Catholics, but it’s one thing when demons are an abstract and quite another when one has taken residence within your only child.  

Tomas Ortega and Marcus Keane stepped foot into Micah’s room once again, the arctic blast smacking them in the face as soon as they crossed the threshold. It was seventy-two degrees outside and thirty degrees in the boy’s room.   

This wasn’t their first exorcism. Each was wearing a long-sleeved black shirt and boots. Tomas was in his clerical jacket and dog collar, the white popping out from the top of his shirt; a purple stole draped around the back of his neck; and black trousers. Marcus was in a crew neck sweatshirt and black jeans.  

Together, they began reciting the Lord’s prayer and swiftly went into the exorcism ritual. It had been the same plan of attack for the past three weeks. The power is in the repetition, Marcus had told Tomas once. Holy water was applied vigorously.  

The demon in Micah reacted aggressively.   

“You cocksuckers think you can take _me_ down?! The half-baked priest who gave it all up for this broken-down _exorcist_?!” It spat the last word out literally as Marcus was right near him and the phlegm landed on his face. Its voice still dominated the room, which vibrated whenever it spoke. “What is it they call you, old man? A lion? What a fucking joke. Here, let me prove it.”  

The next few seconds were the worst of both men’s lives.  

Without moving anything but its hand, the demon positioned it as if it was holding something in its palm. Then, it began squeezing the invisible item.  

Marcus gasped. He shook his head as if to clear it. The Lord’s prayer began flowing from his lips. “Our Father in Heaven, hallowed be Your name. Your ... kingdom … come—”  

His hand flew to his chest. He was having trouble breathing. Still, he tried to continue. “—Your will ... be ... done….”  

“Marcus?!” Tomas asked, panic rising in him as fear crept up his spine.  

The older man slowly turned his head to look at him. “Keep … going,” he gasped.  

Tomas picked up where they had left off with the rites of exorcism. His focus was split, which only made the demon laugh.  

“Yes, extol the virtues of your God, half-priest. When you yourself have lusted after our nearly dead friend here and copulated with what will soon be his carcass. Such issues you have, cub. First, the married whore and now, the dead man.”  

The demon’s fist closed.  

Marcus collapsed onto the floor, landing on his back.   

Tomas could only see half of his partner’s head as the foot of the bed obscured the rest. Marcus’ eyes were open; no life in them.  

The Bible slipped from his fingers as he scrambled to Marcus’ side. Tomas held his lifeless body in his arms; tears cascading freely down his cheeks. A Spanish prayer fell from his lips. Then, he heard the demon cackle.  

“I will save Micah, baby. I may have lost you, but I will bring him back,” Tomas whispered, his lips hovering just a hair above Marcus’.   

He kissed him softly and closed those blue eyes that were as clear as the ocean for the last time. Gently, he rested Marcus’ body on the floor. He stood and walked to the foot of the bed, ignoring the Bible on the floor. His hazel eyes, usually so warm, had gone cold.  

“Micah. I know you can hear me. I know you are still in there fighting. I can help. I just need you to do one thing for me: _Let me in._ ”  

The gruesome smile that was so full of confidence a moment ago, slid off its lips. The demon started to pull at its restraints but couldn’t break free. “NO!”  

The room shook from the reverb of that voice.   

Tomas’ eyes turned white as he fell to his knees.  


	2. Chapter 2

**Three days later…**       
   

It was a bright, sunny day with mild temperatures, but Tomas was too distracted to notice. He hadn’t taken in much of anything outside of the fact everything had been different since Marcus died. Life had gone on, yet nothing was the same. It was disconcerting and comforting at the same time.  

Now, as he drove the black SUV that reeked of the man he loved down the open two-lane road before him, he continued to think about those moments in Micah Matthews’ bedroom. Of how the demon residing in the twelve-year-old boy took control of Marcus’ still beating heart and, with a clench of his hand, destroyed it.  

The fear and determination on the older man’s face as he told Tomas to keep going still haunted him. Marcus wasn’t going to let something as insignificant as his own demise get in the way of saving the soul of a child. That wasn’t his style. Damn his own mortality; the possessed come first. That’s just the way it was.  

Only Marcus’ death wasn’t insignificant — not to Tomas. It was the single most defining moment of the younger exorcist’s life. Funny thing how Marcus was front and center at the bulk of the big events of Tomas’ adult life. Ever since he had the vision of the former priest exorcising a young boy named Gabriel in Mexico City — an event Marcus had told him occurred eighteen months prior to their meeting — Tomas could think of few instances that didn’t lead back to the sardonic Brit.  

Tomas’ eyes welled up thinking about his and Marcus’ time together. His heart still ached when he remembered when the older man had left him behind in Washington state after the death of Andrew Kim on Nachburn Island. He felt a twinge of guilt, even now, regarding Andy’s passing.   

If Tomas hadn’t gotten so deep in Andy’s mind — to the point he had been ready to allow the demon to integrate with him instead — Marcus wouldn’t have had to pull the trigger to bring Tomas back. (The shooting had happened with Andy’s blessing, as the man had regained control long enough to tell Marcus to do it.)   

The older exorcist had eventually returned, thanks to God speaking to Marcus, but their reunion had not been happy, at first.  

It had taken Tomas months to get to a place where he could function without becoming a sloppy mess whenever he would think of his friend. Then, Marcus had shown up and Tomas had blown a fuse. He had torn into Marcus something fierce, saying everything that had remained bottled up during his absence. It ended with Marcus pinning Tomas to ground after the dark-haired priest had started physically attacking the other man.  

What happened next now had Tomas smiling despite himself; a heat rose from his neck only to bloom in his cheeks. Long story short, this was how he and Marcus became a full-fledged couple.   

His hazel eyes shifted to his right wrist, which still bore the cord with the St. Benedict’s medal Marcus had gifted him to help ground him while he had battled a particularly strong demon in his own mind not long after Marcus had come back.

\--------- 

Almost a month ago now, they had been on the road to meet up with fellow exorcist Mouse, who had tracked down their missing-in-action friend. Devon Bennett had disappeared from a hospital in Washington state after he was attacked by one of the fiercest nuns he knew. She had become possessed and eventually integrated with the demon. Bennett was now aware of what that experience was like as he had integrated while unconscious in his hospital bed.   

The Catholic Church had been infiltrated by demons and a couple minions had tracked down Bennett and Mouse, who were closing in on Tomas and Marcus on the island. Mouse exterminated her attackers, but Bennett wasn’t in such a position. Using his love for his lost sister against him and a ceremonial demonic calling card known as Volcare Pulvare, the Ceremony of Ash, Bennett never stood a chance. He decapitated a nurse working the night shift after he woke up and disappeared without a trace.  

Mouse, who had been with Tomas since Marcus left, had departed from the reunited pair after she got a lead on Bennett. The guys had been on the road, stopped at a convenience store with a gas station, when Tomas got the call. She had lost him, but had heard some rumors that were worth investigating. She had told them to enjoy the extra down time and she would be in touch.  

A short time later, when Marcus had emerged from the store with provisions, he found Tomas slumped on the ground beside the SUV. The pump was still stuck in the gas tank. Marcus dropped the bag of food and was beside his partner in an instant. Tomas was just coming out of a vision. His hazel eyes, though unfocused, could be seen instead of the pure white that blocked out both iris and pupil.  

“Tomas?”  

There was no panic in the older man’s voice. This wasn’t the first time he had encountered such a scenario. He was just grateful no one was around to witness anything. The store clerk had been too busy playing on his phone to pay attention to the surveillance camera behind the register.  

“Marcus. ... The boy.”   

Tomas’ voice was strangely toneless. There was no inflection. He was still out of it.   

There was water in the truck. Marcus quickly wrenched open the passenger side door and grabbed a bottle from one of the cupholders. He unscrewed the lid and held it to the other man’s lips. “Drink for me, luv.”  

He exhaled when Tomas took to the bottle. After a few swallows, he looked better. His eyes were focused and color had returned to his cheeks. The tremors in his hands had subsided, as well.   

“Hi.”  

The dark blond smiled. “Hi. Welcome back. How are you feeling?”  

“Okay. My head is throbbing, but it’s passing. More water?”  

Marcus handed him the bottle and Tomas drank it slowly. He was starting to feel normal again.  

“The tank should be full now.”   

The older man nodded. He kept an eye on Tomas as he handled the pump and paid for the gas. When it was done, he knelt beside him again. “Tell me about the boy.”  

Visions were never clear cut. However, this one gave them some information to go on, which was nice. There had been a young boy, maybe eleven or twelve, with red hair. There were sounds of taunting. What looked to be a tall house, like the Rance’s in Chicago — their first exorcism together was of the youngest daughter, high school student Casey.  

“A townhouse,” Marcus clarified.  

Tomas nodded. He mentioned he had seen dogs barking and somewhere in a bedroom there had been a thud, like maybe something had been knocked over, followed by screaming. “That’s all.”  

“It will do.” Marcus recalled something innocuous the clerk had muttered. It could be nothing, but he had a feeling it wasn’t. “I’m gonna run back into the shop for a sec. Let’s get you in the truck first. You feel up to it?”  

Once Tomas was secure with snacks nearby should he need anything, the older man interrogated the clerk. Earlier, Marcus had heard him say, “Poor kid,” and then the clerk — not much more than a kid himself at possibly twenty-one or twenty-two — had shook his head. The clerk was named Rodney, according to his name tag, and he pulled up the blog post he had just read on social media site.  

Someone had set up a fundraising page to help with an area boy’s medical bills. This person had seen how anemic the boy had been, how he had been speaking in weird languages and his bones creaked when he moved. The parents were doing their best, God bless them, but the boy needed help.   

Micah Matthews, who was a ginger if Marcus ever saw one, was a mere forty minutes away, per the clerk, in a development that had been built a couple years ago.  

“Lemme guess,” Marcus said. “Townhouses.”  

The clerk shot him a surprised look as he nodded.  

“This townhouse development got a name?”  

A minute later, Marcus was behind the wheel of the SUV.  

Tomas gave him the update on Bennett as his partner pulled out onto the road. They agreed Micah was the priority.   

“Got to be easier than dealing with an integrated, homicidal Bennett, right?” Marcus had joked.

 --------- 

Tomas was only now barely aware of the silence that filled the cab of the truck as he drove. So lost was he in his own head, he jumped when he heard the static-talk-static-song hum of the radio. He blinked and pinched the bridge of his nose with his left hand.  

“Will you just find something already or turn the damn thing off,” he barked.  

Beside him, Marcus scowled. “If I knew you were going to keep your knickers in a twist, I would have stayed dead.”


	3. Chapter 3

There wasn’t much Marcus could recall about his trip to the great beyond. When it came to memory, it was more emotional than visual. No white light as far as he could tell. There was the feeling of unabashed love and an overwhelming sense of peace. All the internal demons — regret, shame, guilt and the like — had evaporated. What was left, however, was loss. A hollow feeling in his chest, where his heart had once resided, had taken up residence and it was crippling.  

The ache wasn’t immediate; gradually, over what felt like years, it took hold. Time had stretched itself out much like the two-lane roads he drove with Tomas by his side.   

Yes. Tomas.   

There it was. The source of such deep sorrow had revealed itself. Tomas Ortega. The former protégé, forever friend and love of his goddamn life was why Marcus couldn’t find contentment in the afterlife. Once again, he had left Tomas behind — only this time it hadn’t been his choice.  

Marcus had vowed to Tomas and to the Almighty himself he would never leave Tomas again. So, why the bloody hell had he been made a liar? This wasn’t where he was needed or, perhaps, even wanted.   

That place was in the bedroom of a depressed, bullied, sweet twelve-year-old boy, who through no fault of his own, had accepted a demon to possess him in order to make the pain stop.  

That place was in the front seat of a black SUV won in a poker game.  

That place was in a series of shabby motel rooms with basic cable, plus two double beds — neither of which could barely fit two grown men who couldn’t get enough of each other.  

Most importantly, perhaps, that place was by the side of a tall, proud Mexican priest with dark curls and beautiful facial hair flecked with gray that made him both more intimidating and incredibly sexy as they cast out the demons who took advantage of mortal souls in a bid for total domination of humanity.  

There was one auditory parting gift Marcus brought back with him.  

“Go back to him. Your story isn’t done yet.”  

God spoke to him not with words so much as imbued him with such a sense of relief, joy and yearning Marcus feared he would combust, despite being a non-corporeal entity. Then he heard a much missed, familiar voice in the distance. Talking to him and then to Micah — the exorcist couldn’t make out the words, only their meaning — Marcus followed the accented tone back to his own body on the floor of the upstairs bedroom at the end of the hallway on the second floor of the townhouse.  

The air that poured into his lungs, powering his resurrection, was intense — like adrenaline had been injected straight into his heart. Marcus’ lungs took the deepest intake of oxygen as his eyes popped open. It took him a few seconds to re-orientate himself with his surroundings. Slowly, everything flowed back into place. He sat up and used the bed to get himself upright.  

Tomas kneeling on the floor with his head back and his eyes white immediately took Marcus’ attention. The younger man’s Bible was a few feet away from the priest, abandoned. Marcus picked it up and paired it with his copy of the Sacra Christi, which he opened and read from despite knowing the tome inside and out. His voice was sparse and hoarse at first, but soon regained its strength as God’s power coursed through him.  

“No,” the demon said, astonished. Its voice reverberated through the room. “This isn’t possible. I crushed your heart like the nothing it is. It was so easy. How are you back? _How the hell are you alive?!_ ”  

Coolly, the exorcist replied, “Divine providence. Never fuck with an exorcist who is one of God’s chosen. You’ll lose every bloody time.”  

Marcus had his partner’s back while the other man was inside Micah’s mind fighting for the boy’s immortal soul. He silently prayed for them both to return safe and sound before he placed a hand on Tomas’ shoulder and resumed the rites of exorcism.  

“I cast you out, unclean spirit, along with every Satanic power of the enemy, every specter from hell, and all your fell companions…”  


	4. Chapter 4

“My underwear is just fine, thank you very much,” Tomas huffed as he drove. “I’m just tired is all, but I’m fine.”  

Marcus turned off the radio and looked at his partner. He observed the circles under those hazel eyes — usually lit with a fire from within, now dull from exhaustion — the slumped yet tense shoulders; the lips drawn into a tight, thin line.   

“Oh, you’re definitely fine,” he shot back. “What’s that line about what it stands for? Freaked out, insecure, neurotic and emotional. That about sums you up alright.”  

Tomas said nothing because he knew if he did there was no closing the lid on Pandora’s Box. Everything would fly out, spreading nothing but pain, heartache and anger. That would only make things worse between them and that was the last thing Tomas wanted.  

Unfortunately, their relationship was strained. It was weighing on them both, this divide, and neither knew why the other seemed so foreign to them now. Had Marcus’ death breached their bond so irrevocably? How? He had only been gone a few minutes. Tomas barely had time to register it because of Micah. The boy was the priority, not his sentimentality.  

“So, it’s going to be three days of radio silence, eh?” Marcus shook his head and gazed out the passenger side window. “I suppose I should be grateful He’s giving you the same treatment. The last thing we bloody need is for you to have a vision while you’re driving. Although, one giving us a clue about where Bennett Demonseed is hiding would at least distract us from the casket in the room.”  

Marcus was baiting him. This Tomas knew because he knew Marcus. They had been traveling together for six months before the incident with Andy Kim. Then came the hellatus, as Marcus referred to it, where they had been separated. Now, reunited and finding their groove once more, fate had thought it fitting to put yet another obstacle in their path.   

Tomas was over it. They found their way to each other, were parted and still made their way back. God saw fit to bring them together, so could now everything else just fuck off and let them be?  

“We could only be so lucky to get something on Bennett. Though, if I’m being honest, I am not looking forward to that particular battle. It is going to be ugly and bloody, and I’m not sure the four of us will survive.”  

This admission pulled Marcus’ gaze back to Tomas. He wanted to call out the irony of Tomas being honest after the way he had been behaving the past few days, but let it go for now. There was something more important behind what the other man had said. “You’re not just talking about us dying, are you? You’re thinking our relationships won’t make it out alive.”  

A quick glance from his companion was all the confirmation Marcus needed. “What makes you think that?”  

“Just a feeling,” Tomas replied with a noncommittal shrug. “This blanket of dread has been rising up over me since Mouse first told us she found him. It eased a bit when she lost the trail, but it’s back now.”  

“Because I died.”  

The matter-of-fact way Marcus delivered that statement hit Tomas square in the chest like a bullet. His breath hitched and tears stung his eyes. He felt that strong, rough-hewn hand belonging to the man he loved on the back of his neck. Instantly, the panic subsided. Tomas let out a few shaky breaths, but he was better.  

Marcus leaned over and planted a kiss on his boyfriend’s right temple, then rested his forehead on the spot. “I’m right here, luv. It’s not that easy to get rid of me now. We’ll fight whatever comes our way together. Let Bennett, the demons, Lucifer himself come at us. We’ll face them all.”  

Tomas took his right hand off the wheel and squeezed Marcus’ left knee. He let it linger for a few seconds before returning it to its post. Up ahead, he spotted what looked like a good place to pull over. They had been in the SUV for more than a few hours. Both sides of the road were lined with woods, which gave the drive a cozy atmosphere. However, this space was open enough to fit the vehicle, so it cleared the road for oncoming traffic — not there was much.  

When the ignition was turned off, he undid his seatbelt as did Marcus. Tomas kissed him passionately, taking his face in his hands. Marcus replied in kind. The act was cathartic for them both. They had made no sexual contact in the past two days, let alone much regular contact. The silence between them had been deafening. Only the barest minimum of conversation had occurred. Both had wanted more, but Tomas was the one who had pulled back emotionally. It had been tense in that small motel room they left behind only this morning.  

This time, it was Marcus who hit the brakes. The second he felt Tomas’ hand attempt to go under his T-shirt, he knew this wasn’t right. Not now, when there was so much unsaid between them. Tomas had ignored Marcus’ comment about his death and that had not gone unnoticed by the older man.  

“No.” Marcus broke the kiss. A shot of anguish ripped through him as he saw Tomas’ lips reach for him. He placed his thumb on those dark pink pillows and lightly ran over them. “We need to clear the air, Tomas. I can’t do this when you’ve built a wall between us.”  

Tomas pulled back, stung by Marcus’ words. Though they were softly spoken, they breached him, nonetheless. “Then you should have had done your damn job, Marcus.”  

He pushed open the driver’s side door and was out of the vehicle before Marcus could say another word. The hard slam of the door lightly rocked the SUV.  

“Fucking hell,” Marcus muttered as he sighed. “Here we go.”  


	5. Chapter 5

The terrain was unfamiliar, yet Tomas kept walking. His feet moving — in what direction he didn’t know — but he had faith he was heading the right way. A spotlight scanned the area ahead of Tomas. When it came toward him, he jumped out of its way. He didn’t know a lot of things in this moment, but one thing he was aware of was he didn’t want to be seen.  

Crouched until the spotlight disappeared, Tomas tried to get his bearings. It was near impossible in the darkness that surrounded him. After a few minutes, his vision grew accustomed to the black and he could see somewhat. There was another figure to his right. It looked like it was quite small. Tomas knew it could be a trick or it could be nothing … or it could be Micah.  

Tentatively, he stood and approached whatever it was now in front of him. As he drew closer, he could hear whimpering. Tomas’ guard was up. When he was near enough for the figure to hear him, he said, “God loves you.”  

“How can He?” replied a small voice, thick with emotion.  

“He loves all His children, Micah,” Tomas affirmed. “Especially the meek and abused. He sees your enormous heart and it breaks His to see you taken advantage of when what you truly need is to be heard and to be protected. However, He and I both know you are strong.”  

“I’m not strong.”  

Tomas closed the gap between them and crouched down before the boy. He could see now Micah was sitting as he hugged his knees to his chest. Wearing the same clothes Tomas had seen him in for the past three weeks, the boy looked terrified and remorseful.  

“Yes, you are.” Tomas put a hand on Micah’s arm. “I wouldn’t be here if you weren’t.”  

“I let those kids bully and torment me. I let that thing take over me. I - I - I killed your friend.” Tears were streaming down his freckled face. His lower lip trembled uncontrollably. “Strong people don’t do those things. I’m weak. I’m worthless. I don’t deserve to be saved.”  

“ _Don’t. Don’t ever believe that._ ” Tomas was gripping Micah’s face. His hazel eyes piercing into the boy’s light blue ones. They were the same shade as Marcus’. This detail fueled Tomas’ devotion of the saving the young man. “You let me in because you want to be saved, Micah. I am here because you deserve to be saved. God would not have led me to you if you weren’t worthy of His love and forgiveness.”  

His own eyes were welling up. Tomas blinked away the tears. “You are forgiven. You are redeemed. You are loved.”  

Micah threw his arms around the exorcist. Tomas hugged him as tightly as the boy did with him. God, how he wished Marcus was there. He was so good with children. Tomas wasn’t bad, he had to admit, but Marcus was the child whisperer. No matter their temperament, they flocked to him and loved him.  

“I miss my mom and dad,” Micah whispered.  

“They miss you, too,” Tomas assured him. “But we need to get out of here so you can see them again. Yes?”  

Micah pulled back to look at Tomas. “Yes.” There was a small silence. “What do I call you?”  

The older man smiled. “Tomas.”  

A spotlight lit upon them, capturing the duo in its white orb.  

The sound of a snap and the darkness, as well as the spotlight, was gone.  

Tomas and Micah were standing in grass. Surrounding them on either side were rows and rows of short rectangles made of stone and marble.  

Headstones.  

They were in a cemetery. It appeared the two of them were alone. Then, Tomas spotted a couple a few yards away. The man and woman were kneeling before another headstone, fresh flowers were being placed on the dirt in front of them.  

“Oh Dios mío.”  

“Mom? Dad?”  

“They can’t hear you, Micah,” Tomas told him. “It’s just an illusion. It’s not real.”  

“You don’t think the poor boy’s parents will bury an empty casket just to have something to visit once I eviscerate his soul, cub?”  

The demon had taken on a new form. One more insidious to Tomas than anything he could have imagined. It wasn’t the first time a demon had taken this shape. He knew it wouldn’t be the last. A sharp stab of pain pierced Tomas’ already broken heart. He didn’t know if he could handle any more torment, but he was about to find out.  

Marcus stood before him looking every bit as handsome as he had when he was alive. Only it wasn’t the same. It was a poor facsimile. The glow Tomas saw whenever he looked at him was gone. This was just a demon in a meat suit, nothing more. Such a maneuver in this moment was an insult that enraged Tomas.   

“You will not harm this boy’s soul, demon,” Tomas declared with steel in his voice. “He is _my ward_ now.”   

“Sorry, luv, but you’re not a patch on the old gray lion. Now there was a true artist. It pained me to end his life, but,” it shrugged its shoulders, “can’t afford to be precious now there’s a war on. The plans they have for you though....”  

The blue eyes brightened as it sucked in air through its teeth. “ _So exciting._ ”  

“Is that the best you can do?” Tomas asked. “Appear like him and gloat as if you know anything? You know nothing. It’s time I show you this once and for all.”  

A breeze kicked up.  

Tomas immediately assumed the demon was looking to add a bit more drama to the aesthetic. “A bit much, isn’t it?”  

Then he saw the worried look on the demon’s face. This wasn’t him. A surge of warmth spread through Tomas’ chest. He felt the weight of the St. Benedict’s bracelet on his right wrist.  

“Siempre conmigo, mi amor.” He said this so softly the words took flight on the wind.  

In a more powerful timbre, he began the rites of exorcism. “‘I cast you out, unclean spirit, along with every Satanic power of the enemy, every specter from hell, and all your fell companions; in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ. Begone and stay far from this creature of God. For it is He who commands you, He who flung you headlong from the heights of heaven into the depths of hell.’”  

The ground began to quake. Micah’s parents were no longer on the scene. The boy yelled out Tomas’ name. Instinctively, the exorcist reached behind for him, pulling him toward his back when he felt Micah’s hand in his other one. Tomas kept up his recitations while keeping a hand on his ward. Micah was his first, but he would not be his last.  

As Tomas continued, he watched with satisfaction and horror as the skin on the Marcus meat suit began to melt. The shrieks that emanated from the creature were the most horrific sounds Tomas had ever heard. He squeezed Micah’s arm, hoping the boy had his ears covered and wishing he could better protect them both from the screech.  

 _The power’s in the repetition._   

“The power of Christ compels you!” he screamed over the cacophony. “The power of Christ compels you! The power of Christ compels you!”  

There was steam rising off the demon, which was slowly calcifying. Tomas didn’t understand how it was possible for steam to appear. It was as if someone was dousing it with holy water back in the real world.  

No.   

It can’t be.   

Or can it?  

 _Therefore, what God has joined together, let no one separate._   

“Marcus.”  

As soon as Tomas breathed the name of his beloved, the calcification of the demon was complete. It toppled over, shattering into a million tiny pieces; all of which was blown away by a gust of wind. All was quiet.  

Micah.  

Tomas no longer felt him and when he turned around, the boy was gone.  

So was the cemetery.  

The scene had changed once more.   

Now he was standing in a beautiful meadow, the sun shining on his face. He felt amazing. There was love in his heart and peace in his soul. It was like being with Marcus. He had only felt this level of contentment with his true love. What was God showing him? The future? Was he making him a promise?  

Then he recalled what had occurred to him only moments before in the cemetery before the demon had been handled.  

Marcus was alive.  

“Tomas.”  

He could hear his voice in the air and answered it happily. “I’m coming.”  

Tomas came back to himself in Micah’s room. The boy was being cocooned by his parents, who were hugging him, kissing him and muttering words of adoration. Micah locked eyes with Tomas for a second and gave a small smile. The exorcist smiled back and nodded.  

A hand was now on his back and he got a whiff of the Matthews’ hand soap Marcus had washed his face and neck with that morning. Tomas leaned into the touch as he cast his eyes to his left, where they met a pair of intense blue ones.  

“I thought I lost you,” the younger man said quietly.  

“God brought me back,” the older man replied, matching his lover’s tone. “Told me to bugger off. That I was better off with you. Couldn’t exactly argue with that logic.”  

Tomas didn’t know if he should laugh or cry. It was like Marcus had been never taken from him. That dry British humor was still intact. Instead, he did neither. He wrapped his arms around Marcus’ neck and clung to him tightly. When he felt Marcus do the same around his waist with one hand on his back, Tomas buried his face in the man’s neck.  

An exorcism and a resurrection.   

Two miracles in one day.  

Tomas wasn’t sure he wanted to know what tomorrow would bring.


	6. Chapter 6

Marcus tore after Tomas, catching up with him a little way down the dirt trail. It didn’t take as much effort as he had expected, seeing as how Tomas was standing there in a deep blue short-sleeved T-shirt, black jeans and boots with his hands on his hips. His head was turned slightly to the left so he could hear when Marcus approached.  

“You’ve thrown better moodies than that,” the older man teased when he was beside him. “You’re getting soft in your old age.”  

Tomas flashed a small smile, but his heart wasn’t in it. He watched as Marcus stood next to him, hands in the pockets of his black skinny jeans. His gaze stayed on his boyfriend’s lower half. He observed Marcus’ right forearm, wrist and thumb; the leg of his jeans; the scuffed black boots that were like his own.   

Slowly, his eyes came back up till they were admiring the snug fit of the plumb V-neck T-shirt that showed off the definition of his chest and musculature of his upper arms. It was almost as if the man had been sculpted just for him. In a way he had, Tomas realized. Just as he was preordained to crash land in Marcus’ orbit.  

Why was he pushing away the only person he wanted to let in? The question had stopped him cold after he bolted from the SUV. Marcus won’t put up with his bullshit forever. He could have chased after Tomas now only to tell him to piss off and he would be right. So, he waited for Marcus. His breathing was shallow, but not from the exertion. This was a man who could run for miles. But he was done avoiding his emotions; bottling them and sending them out to sea.  

“When do we get a break?” Tomas asked.  

“What do you mean?”  

The tip of the younger man’s tongue touched his upper lip briefly as he considered his words. It was all Marcus could do not to take Tomas’ face in his hands and suck on his tongue while capturing that luscious mouth with his own. He could see the frustration roiling off his partner in waves.  

“You thought it’d be easier now we’re together?” Marcus asked as a follow-up.  

“Yes. United, we’d be more formidable.” Tomas shook his head. “But our first assignment and you’re dead on the floor.”  

“The odds were always against us,” Marcus replied calmly, “but that’s why we fight. And we win, don’t we? Micah is back with his parents, who are going to fight for him and other disenfranchised kids at that nightmare school. He survived a bloody demon. He’ll survive whatever life throws at him.”  

He turned to properly look at Tomas, who followed suit. “Micah’s safe because of you. _You_ fought for him, Tomas. You don’t need me to do the job anymore.”  

“What are you saying? Of course, I do,” Tomas protested. “Am as I good as you? Perhaps, but it’s because I’m learning from you every day. We’re a team, Marcus. I don’t want to do this without you. And you don’t want to do this without me. _Any of it._ ”  

“If I’m such a necessity, why have you barely seen fit to be with me for the past two days?” The words came out harsher than Marcus had intended, but it was nonetheless true. Tomas had been there physically in the strictest sense, but that was all.  

It was the vitriol that struck Tomas the hardest. He knew he had pulled away and he had regretted it even as he did it. However, he couldn’t stop himself from doing so, no matter how much he wanted to just lay in bed with Marcus.  

“I don’t know,” he mumbled, unable to tear his eyes away from the searing blue fire of Marcus’.  

“Bullshit.”  

“I was scared!”  

“ _I’m the one who bloody well died! How the fuck_ _do_ _you think I felt?!_ ” Marcus roared.  

Tomas’ heart clenched and his stomach dropped. “I don’t know,” he answered meekly.  

“That’s right, you don’t.” The older man stepped into Tomas’ personal space, inches from his face. “You were too busy placating me while you holed up inside yourself because it’s all about you, innit? The rising _fucking_ star.”  

Despite the extreme close proximity between the two, Tomas didn’t blink. He hated the rising star moniker, but also knew Marcus only said it to get a rise out of him. “I’m sorry. It was selfish. I should have been there for you.”  

“You’re damn right,” Marcus chastised. “I needed you and you were gone. Is this punishment for Washington?”  

“No! This has nothing to do with that.” Tomas was horrified Marcus would even think that. The past had been dealt with and forgiven. “I freaked out, okay?! That acronym you rattled off in the car? You were right. What was it? Freaked out, insecure, neurotic and emotional. _That’s me._ ”  

Marcus let out a puff of a laugh, but there was no mirth in it. He rolled his eyes and shook his head.  

“That’s us,” Tomas added in a moment of clarity.  

The dark blond cast his piercing gaze on him. Nothing was said for a short period. He clapped his hands slowly. “Only took you three bloody days to figure it out. Nice of you to finally take your head out of your arse, luv.”  

He took off down the dirt path not seeing where he was going. It was either the righteous indignation blinding him or the stinging tears. Or maybe both; he couldn’t be sure in the moment.   

The sound of Tomas calling after him didn’t slow him down. Even when he of the dark, curly hair that Marcus loved carding his fingers through and gripping in moments of intense pleasure had caught up with him, the older man didn’t stop.  

It was only when Tomas put a death grip on his wrist did Marcus come to a halt. He looked over to see a mix of wonder and awe dance on the other man’s features. “Tomas? What is it?”  

Tomas wasn’t looking at him, but at the meadow before them into where the path emptied. It was lovely with tall, green grass and leafy trees dotting the perimeter. The sun poured its rays over everything. It resembled Eden. Marcus’ breath had been taken away by its beauty.   

“Oh. I see.”  

“No, you don’t, Marcus.” He fought his own tears as he caught his true love’s eye. “God showed me this very spot after I saved Micah. Before I came back to you. The last thing I heard before I returned was _you_ saying my name. My last thought was to share this with _you_. I think He wanted us to be here.” 


	7. Chapter 7

The drive back to the motel from the Matthews’ residence was filled with soft touches and anticipatory glances. There was an energy in the air that was giving them a contact high. Tomas was behind the wheel, though he wasn’t one hundred percent certain he should be considering he not only entered the mind of a twelve-year-old boy where he faced down a demon, but he also had a vision from God.   

Not to mention the death and resurrection of the love of his life.   

All this happening within the span of an afternoon was a lot to absorb.  

Even more so when you were the subject of said death and resurrection.  

Marcus’ body was humming. He felt like a livewire that would electrocute the first person who touched him. The desire which consumed every look Tomas gave him made the dark blonde confident who would be lucky enough to absorb his spark. He rubbed Tomas’ right thigh with his hand as the younger man did his level best to keep the SUV on the road. It wasn’t fair, but Marcus found he needed Tomas in a way that terrified him.  

He couldn’t keep his hand off his lover. His fingers wound their way through the dark curls that ghosted the nape of his neck. (At this, Tomas let out a whimper despite his best attempts to stay quiet.)  

Tomas pulled out the dog collar from his shirt, tossing it onto the backseat, and undid the top buttons. The change in his breathing had not gone unnoticed. When he snuck another look at Marcus, his pupils were blown and Marcus thought he had never wanted him more.  

They had just made it inside their room when they came together in an explosion of lips, tongues and hands. Clothes were removed in a frenzy. Then, Marcus pinned Tomas face first to the nearest wall. He wasn’t thinking; acting not reacting was the call of the moment. His tongue ran over the shell of Tomas’ ear, earning a shudder from the other man.  

“May I?” Marcus asked, delivering the words directly into Tomas’ auditory canal.  

His hands were currently on that olive-skinned pert ass; caressing its cheeks and aching to part them to get at the prize. He marveled at the smooth skin that covered his man. Attention turned higher, as a trail of kisses connected those lovely shoulder blades.  

“Yes,” Tomas moaned. “You never have to ask, querido. Just take me. I’m yours.”  

It occurred to Marcus he would have to leave Tomas to go fetch the lube and a condom, both of which were kept in their bags so they would always be prepared. “Be right back.”  

“Just the lube.”  

Marcus paused. “You sure?”  

“We don’t need them,” he rasped. “We haven’t even used them. No point.”  

The grin that spread on Tomas’ lips made the dark blond step close and kiss him. He winked and headed to his bag. Lube in hand, he applied it liberally to his hard cock and then turned his attention to Tomas’ hole.  

Marcus enjoyed watching him writhe as he was fingered. It made the wait almost unbearable as they both were aching for release. “Almost there, luv,” he cooed as he added a second finger.  

“A third,” Tomas moaned. “You’re bigger than you think.”  

“Am I now?” Concern found its way into his next words, despite the light tone with which they were delivered. “You should have said something.”  

Turning his head around to look at his lover, the glint in Tomas’ eyes was unmistakable. “I didn’t mind the hurt at first, but it seemed relevant now. Wouldn’t want to break me, would you?”  

“Never.” Marcus responded, capturing his lips in a sloppy kiss made even messier by Tomas’ eager reply.  

The third finger nearly undid the younger man, washing away any momentary trepidation. A few seconds later, he was breaching Tomas, who let out a beautiful noise once Marcus was in him. The rhythm they worked out was giving them the momentum they wanted, but not yet the one they needed. Marcus dug his fingers into his lover’s hips as Tomas thrust his ass to meet what connected them physically.  

“You feel so good,” Tomas muttered breathlessly.  

“So, do you, luv.” Marcus could barely get the words out. “So tight … so hot.”   

The younger man gripped the base of his own cock to stave off his pending orgasm. It wasn’t time yet. When he felt Marcus adjust himself, he knew what was coming. The magic button that was his prostate had been found.   

He threw his head back, grazing Marcus’ shoulder as the older man pounded him, and began stroking himself in earnest. A sheen of perspiration coated each man. Their moans originated from places deep within them. Marcus kissed his partner’s shoulder. Then, another hand joined the one Tomas had on his cock. Together, they stroked him into submission.  

They came a short time later. Marcus filled Tomas with his seed, while his partner spilled all over both their hands. Both were trembling; their legs just about holding them up. Marcus rubbed the top of his head on Tomas’ back. Tomas took their come-covered hands and, interlacing their fingers, pressed the back of his lover’s hand against his stomach. His other hand was firmly against the wall, supporting both men.  

“Are you okay?” Tomas asked, turning his head.   

“Better than okay,” Marcus panted. He kissed multiple points on that glistening back; sweat drops giving a salty residue to the normally sweet-tasting skin.  

“Good.”   

“How are you?”  

“Big as a mountain,” Tomas said, smiling.  

“Well, if that’s not the God’s honest truth…” Marcus said with a chuckle.  

Before he knew it, his lean frame was in the arms of this bronze god. Tomas wore the role well thanks to his fit body and facial hair. Marcus placed a hand over that beard while he kissed him and used his tongue to tease his way into Tomas’ mouth. Being carried to their bed was something he could get used to, but really, he wanted to return the favor at some point in the near future. Especially now they had one.  

Tomas spread him out on the bed, which had been made up in their absence. He took in the sight before him with a reverence he heretofore only reserved for God. Now two beings received such admiration from him. This emotion only deepened when he saw how expertly — and with minimal effort — Marcus turned down the bed while essentially staying in position. Somehow, this turned on Tomas even more.  

He grabbed the lube from the other bed, where Marcus had tossed it after using it for round one and put it on the nightstand between the two queen-sized beds. Then he climbed onto their mattress, ran his hands up Marcus’ legs and began using his mouth to work the pale skin of Marcus’ torso. Tomas worked his way up till he was teasing the man’s dark pink nipples, which were already hard. Once he had finished, they were also swollen. As he worked, the sounds coming from Marcus were exciting Tomas, as well.  

“You’re so beautiful, baby.” Tomas told him, meeting his eyes.  

“I don’t know about that,” Marcus rebuffed. He knew Tomas meant every word.  

“I do.”  

The older man was enjoying this. The ability to be there in that moment with the man he loved, who loved him just as much, and to be able to touch him, feel him, be one with him was overwhelming. He tried to blink the tears from his eyes, but that didn’t stop them from reappearing. His fingers once again carded through Tomas’ dark curls as he watched him lay claim to his scarred, tattered body.  

Of course, Tomas wouldn’t think Marcus was anything less than beautiful, something to be respected and adored. They hadn’t been a couple long, a few weeks really, but when they finally consummated their relationship in a motel room not unlike the one they were currently occupying, Tomas had made his feelings clear. He wanted Marcus to see himself the way Tomas saw him.   

The world-weary traveler wondered if he would ever be able to view himself the way his lover did. He knew he had no trouble seeing Tomas in that light. God could have struck him blind before he had ever met the younger man and Marcus still would have known the beauty that was before him.  

Now they were both staring into each other eyes; smiles on both their faces.  

“You weren’t gone that long, querido, and yet it’s like I haven’t seen you in days.”  

“I know. Maybe it’s because we thought we would never be like this again.”  

Tomas nodded. “That’s exactly it.”  

He kissed him deeply. Marcus opened his mouth for him without any prodding. Their tongues flicked, messaged and reacquainted themselves with a space that had come to feel like home in such a short time. That’s what Marcus and Tomas were to each other … home.  

“Are you ready?” Tomas asked against his lover’s lips.  

“Sí, amor. I need you so much.” Marcus captured Tomas’ mouth with his own, holding onto him as Tomas’ hands stayed on him.  

When they broke apart, Tomas spread Marcus’ legs so he could fit between them. He kept his eyes on those sharp blues before him as he used both of his hands to play with Marcus’ balls. His lips went to every inch of pale skin available to him. The sensation that rippled through the other man was intense, but nothing like what was to come. He was looking forward to doing that, too.  

Marcus found he couldn’t take his eyes off Tomas. He had thought his favorite image of him would be in uniform on the job. The fact he was now naked, working those skilled fingers on his balls as those lips were claiming his epidermis bought another smile to Marcus’ face. It grew as he watched one spread on Tomas’ luscious lips. Those same lips he was now bringing down to wrap around Marcus’ hard, leaking cock.  

“Fuck that feels amazing.” The dark blond didn’t so much say the words as blow them out. He was not sure how much longer he was going to last if Tomas kept that up.  

Tomas gradually took in all of him, releasing his balls from his hands only when the need to touch more of Marcus became too much for him to ignore.  

“Magician,” Marcus mumbled as his eyes rolled back in his head.  

After a couple minutes, he felt empty and cold. The heat from Tomas mouth and hands on him was gone. However, he was still there. Marcus watched as the man lubed himself and then went to work on the older man’s hole, moving his cock so it laid on Marcus’ stomach. The atmosphere of the room was so erotically charged, Marcus was convinced they would combust once Tomas breached him.  

That would definitely be the way he would choose to go. It would be an improvement over how he went out only hours earlier. He shoved the thought from his mind. Not now. Just this now. Just Tomas.  

He longed to touch him, but that couldn’t happen just yet. Tomas had resumed their connection, penetrating him with his dexterous fingers and it was wonderful. He needed more though. He needed all of the man who had stolen his heart, and claimed him body and soul.  

“Now you’re ready, baby,” Tomas told him, seeing the lust and wanton need in his eyes.  

“Yes,” Marcus replied, propping himself up on shaky elbows.  

His breath sharply sucked in as Tomas entered him, their eyes again locked on each other as he made sure Marcus was okay. A nod, followed by “Do it, luv” was all the encouragement the dark-haired man needed. Marcus wondered if Tomas could read his mind as he surged forward once he was fully inside him and caught the dark blond’s mouth in a searing kiss.   

Their lips met in accordance to the rhythm of Marcus’ hips and Tomas’ thrusts. Moans were delivered into the other’s mouth. Hands were on the mattress. Heat pooled low inside them, then rose steadily until it flooded their bodies. The explosions occurred simultaneously. Their bodies shaking in an orgasmic rush. Marcus flung an arm around Tomas’ neck as his lover pulled them both up into a sitting position.  

His legs wrapped around Tomas’ hips, they finished together. Tomas pounded him through their orgasms. Come covered both their stomachs as it poured into Marcus. They also were dripping with sweat, but held onto each other regardless. Their mouths never stopped finding their way back to their mates. The kisses became less intense, but no less intimate.   

Falling back onto the mattress, Tomas pulled out a few minutes later and rolled over so Marcus was on top of him. There was a natural glow coming from them both. Marcus kissed his lover’s chest while he glided his hands over the area. He leaned into the touch of Tomas’ hand as it runs over his head.  

“I love you, Tomas. I love you as much I love Him.” He flicked his eyes up toward that beaming face.  

“Me siento exactamente igual, Marcus.” The smile faltered and morphed into something more tender. “Te amo tanto que me asusta.”  

“Scares me, too, but in the best way.”  

“You came back to me.”  

“Always.” Marcus pushed himself up so he could kiss Tomas on the chin before catching his lips.  

He hummed as Tomas’ lips left his own, meandering along his cheek and jaw till he could nip at his earlobe. The feel of those hands caressing his back and ass was better than eternity in Heaven. God could strike him down for that blasphemous thought right now and Marcus would only be sorry he was once more parted from Tomas.  

Eventually, they fell asleep. Marcus had scooted to his lover’s side, those arms enveloping him to ensure he could never leave. It was dark out when they woke up hours later. The clock on the nightstand showed it was after nine. Their stomachs rumbled, which made Tomas laugh.  

He forced himself out of bed and into the shower. Marcus hated to see him leave, but loved watching him go. Before he closed the bathroom door, Tomas observed the love of his life as he plumped the pillows and positioned himself so he was comfortable. He broke out into a wide grin when Marcus caught him.  

Twenty minutes later, Tomas emerged from the bathroom a changed man. Marcus noticed the shift instantly. For some reason, the younger man’s guard was up. Over the next two days, Stepford Tomas cared for his boyfriend in ways that were viewed as sweet, at first. It wasn’t long before they started to grate.  

The intimacy was gone. Marcus was getting flashbacks to St. Aquinas, the facility for broken priests in Illinois where he had spent considerable time after being unable to save young Gabriel in Mexico City. He had observed the staff treating some of the more damaged priests in a similar matter. It had pissed him off then and didn’t fare any better now. He had tried questioning Tomas, who assured him everything was fine.   

“Rest for a couple days; then we’ll try to catch up with Mouse even if we haven’t heard from her,” he said.  

“I’ll rest I’m dead,” Marcus muttered.  

“That’s not funny. Two days. For me?”  

A long, temper-quelling sigh blew out of Marcus. He nodded, not trusting himself to speak. Those two days had been the most painful and awkward Marcus had spent with Tomas. They had even stopped sharing a bed. The older man opted to sleep alone. He was packed and ready to go on the third morning before the other man had even woken up.  

“Coffee. Danish,” he said pointing to the items on the desk opposite the beds when the younger man opened his eyes. “ _We’re leaving._ You have twenty minutes or I’m going without you. I’ll be in the truck.”  

Left in his wake was a hurt Tomas, who didn’t bother hiding the tears streaming down his cheeks as the door slammed shut.  


	8. Chapter 8

“Why here?” Marcus asked softly.  

He took in the landscape, and while lovely, it didn’t seem particularly resonant. However, he was hardly one to take His wishes with a grain of salt. It was nice to be out, enjoying His handiwork. Perhaps he and Tomas could take this time to clear the air between them.   

“Oh.” Marcus softly snorted, lifting his eyes toward the heavens. Clever.  

“We do have some things to talk about,” Tomas conceded, his hand still clasped to Marcus’ wrist. Tears stung his eyes.  

Those blue eyes shifted down to meet the wet hazel ones looking at him hopefully. Marcus turned, using his free hand to wipe the drops from those apple cheeks.  

“Yes, we do.” His voice held a tenderness that was only reserved for the man in front of him. “Shall we walk?”  

A ghost of a smile haunted Tomas’ lips. He gave a small nod and released Marcus from his touch. His hand flexed instinctively, already missing the feel of his boyfriend’s skin against his own.  

They walked only a few steps before Marcus broke the silence. There had been far too much of it late and now he knew why they were there, he was determined to get the answers that had thus far eluded him.  

“Where did you go? One minute I was in bed with my boyfriend; the next, some replicant comes out of the shower in his place.”  

“I know. I’m sorry. You’re the one who died and I manage to make it all about me.” He glanced at Marcus. “I’m here now. I still want to know everything you can remember. Mouth shut. Ears open. You have my word.”  

Eyes staring straight ahead, Marcus made a noncommittal noise. “Still haven’t answered my question. Do that properly and maybe I’ll consider your request.”  

Tomas dropped his glance.  

It didn’t matter to Marcus his partner was stung. That was fleeting. The hurt and anger churning inside him, however, was different. He turned his attention to their locale, lest those negative feelings that were festering take over and truly ruin their relationship. He didn’t want that, but he did want honesty. Total transparency was what they had agreed on when they embarked on this new chapter.  

Almost two months later and they were already putting it to the test.  

“Total transparency,” Marcus reminded him.  

Tomas’ words. The ones he had uttered to Marcus in the dive bar the day he had walked back into Tomas’ life after leaving him behind all those months ago to be shepherded by Mouse. They still held water with him.   

“I’ve been trying to figure out how to put it all into words for the past two days and yet nothing seems right. I am not sure how to make you understand, when _I_ barely do.”  

“Maybe just open your mouth and see what comes out.”   

Marcus bit his lower lip in regret. The bile was rising and finding ways of slipping out. He shook his head. It couldn’t have been easy for Tomas to watch him die and still go on with the exorcism. Those minutes — hours? — when he was gone, not destined to return, had to have been hard on him.  

“It’s okay, querido,” Tomas assured him, putting a hand on his shoulder as they continued to amble. “You are right. So here goes nothing.”  

The touch was brief and the exhale was long. “I was so happy when I got into that shower. The biggest, stupidest grin on my face. I couldn’t wash it away — or so I thought. My brain … it started going off on these tangents. Most of them wonderful. Wish fulfillment stuff, you know? What our happily ever after would be like. After we save Bennett and the world.”  

A bashful smile grew on his lips. Marcus caught a glimpse of it when he thought Tomas wasn’t looking. The image abated some of the darkness within.   

 _Let there be light._   

“If you were thinking of rainbows and puppy dogs, why….” The older man was choking on the words he knew needed to be said. A couple deep breaths, then he was calm enough to continue. “Why did you pull away from me when I needed you most?”  

He leveled a look of blame and betrayal at Tomas that withered the younger man’s heart.  

Tomas stopped walking. When Marcus also came to a stop and turned to look at him, he confessed. “Because I couldn’t stop seeing your corpse staring blankly back at me. Every milestone, big and small, that I envisioned was punctuated by your dead body. It shook me like my visions do. I expected you to come charging into the bathroom, so sure I was I had cried out. But you never came. And I thought, ‘Is he dead?’”  

The tears had returned, but he blinked them away. “But I knew you weren’t and yet, somehow, I got it into my head that if I didn’t push, if I gave you space — for what I don’t know — it would keep us safe from all the shit that is constantly raining down on us. I convinced myself I was selfish for putting our lovemaking ahead of your well-being. That I was contributing to the problem instead of making it better.”  

There was uncertainty etched into every inch of his face. “Am I making sense? Do you see why I was afraid to dump this on you? I barely understand it myself.”  

To himself, he muttered, “Cristo Todopoderoso, Tomás, deja de hablar o esto terminará donde empezó. Sólo tú serás el de Santa Aquinas.”  

This got a small chuckle from Marcus, but the light faded from his eyes quickly. “I understand, but you cut me out of our relationship by keeping it to yourself. You made me feel more alone than I have ever felt and that’s saying something.”  

He turned and took a few steps away from Tomas, then stopped. “This is what drove us apart the last time. The irony of it being you who instigates it now.”  

Tomas wanted to reply, but no words would come. The silence between them was heavy with recrimination. He watched the back of Marcus, suddenly fearful it would be the last he saw of him. How could he have so badly screwed this up? His lover’s words replayed in his mind. Each one punctured his heart as if he had been stabbed over and over by the other man.  

Marcus turned back to face him. “If not for divine intervention, how long would you have kept it up?”  

“I don’t know.”   

The honesty was wrenching. There was a hopelessness that broke Marcus’ heart. His eyes were wet before he noticed. “We can’t keep doing this. It’s going to kill us before any demon gets its chance.”  

Tomas nodded. “You’re right. I can do better. I _will_ do better.” He closed the gap between them, taking Marcus’ face in his hands. “I love you and trust you and believe in us. I freaked out. I admit that. But you _died_. Cut me a little slack?”  

The dark blond searched those hazel eyes for understanding. He saw it and let in some of his own. “I died.”  

“Yes. You did.”  

“And I came back.” This came out as a whisper.  

He pulled Marcus into an embrace; one arm around his shoulders and the other hand gripping the back of his neck. “You did, querido. God knew we had work to do. That I couldn’t do this without you. Any of this.”  

Marcus clung to Tomas, burying his face in his neck and inhaling his scent to center himself. His man was his home and he never felt as whole as he did when he was with him. “I didn’t want to stay and He let me go. It was just as you said.”  

Those hazel eyes widened when he heard his love speak. His heart skipped a beat and his pulse quickened. God, in His infinite wisdom, had granted their wish. Tomas hadn’t realized he had sent a prayer when Marcus died, but he knew now he had. Marcus didn’t want leave. He wanted to come back.  

It was his turn to bury his face in his man’s neck and breathe him in. He closed his eyes, which were damp with tears, and silently thanked Him with all his heart and soul.  

“I don’t want to go.” Marcus’ voice was thick with emotion.  

“Go where?” Tomas didn’t understand. “Where are we going?”  

“It was the last thought I remember having before I died.”   

The tears were steady now for both men. They held each other as the warm rays of the late morning sun shone down. A light breeze came in from the south, causing the tall grass and the green leaves on the trees to rustle.   

Calm. Protected. Loved.   

He was with them now, their Father; watching over them as always. His sons. His soldiers. The two He knew were made for each other, now reconnecting, re-forging that bond that had been mistakenly broken.  


	9. Chapter 9

They took their time as they ambled through the meadow. There was no rush; no place else they needed to be. Their hands brushed more than once as they made their way, until Marcus took Tomas’ hand in his; their fingers intertwining. Tomas kissed Marcus’ shoulder, rubbing the top of his head on the spot. No words had been exchanged since Marcus admitted what had been his final thought before passing away.  

When they had released each other from the embrace, they had wiped away each other’s tears and leaned into each other’s touch. Tomas had nodded toward the meadow and Marcus had returned the nod. So, they walked. Neither wanted to rush the conversation; push it instead of letting the words come naturally.  

“I’m glad you didn’t want to go,” Tomas admitted as he glanced at his boyfriend. “It’s selfish, I know. But there it is.”  

“It’s honest,” Marcus replied. There was a pause. “I was so fucking pissed off. Ripped away by some pissant demon that thought it was a good idea to prey on an innocent boy. Torn from my life just when it finally had gotten good.” He looked at Tomas. “When I had found _someone_ good.”  

There was no denying the hope and love in Tomas’ eyes. Even better, he could see it reflected in Marcus’. The tentative smile which tugged on his lips broke through until it was so big it lit up his entire face.   

Marcus realized just how much he had missed that smile over the past couple days. “Don’t ever hide that smile from me again.”  

“Never.” Tomas held his gaze for a few more steps before tearing away so he could watch where he was going.  

Not that it mattered. The ground was level and soft. He ran his free hand over the tops of the blades of grass, which were waist high. As he looked up, it occurred to him how serene it all was. All the negativity they had come in with had been washed away with their tears. The barriers had been broken down.  

This was exactly what Marcus was reflecting upon. It was hard to ignore the ethereal quality this oasis had in spades. He could feel God in every particle of the place and within himself. No doubt Tomas also was experiencing His heavenly touch. The older man could feel His pulse where their hands met.  

“You feel Him?”  

Tomas hummed. “He is everywhere here. He made this place just for us.”  

“Our own private couples retreat.”  

A low chuckle rumbled from the younger man’s throat. “Do you know of a better counselor?”  

“Got me there.” Marcus stopped as did Tomas. “May I kiss you? I fear I may have lost that right.”  

“ _I’m_ the one who’s worried he may never get to properly kiss you again,” Tomas told him. “You will always have that right.”  

“So do you, luv. All privileges restored.”   

He released his hand from Tomas’ and ran his fingers through the dark, trim beard he knew his love grew to make himself appear older (and more desirable to his partner). The relived exhale from Tomas made him smile. Touching him in this intimate way was something he sincerely believed had been lost to him forever. Death couldn’t separate them, but their own neuroses nearly did.  

Those lips once more on his own and Tomas knew this must be Heaven. It was like their first kiss, but amplified all the way to eleven. He slid his arms around the man who was his breath, someone he could not live without, and pulled him close. His mouth captured Marcus’ the second the other man broke the kiss.   

Twice he had been taken from Tomas. Twice he had returned. It almost had happened a third time. This reminder had the younger man tightening his hold on his soulmate. Never again. Never again would this person who was his other half, his better half — for he made Tomas want to be a better man in every respect — leave his side. They were in this now. Wherever this journey took them, it would be together.  

The kisses were meaningful and passionate yet chaste. No tongues; nothing deeper. Not yet. That would come soon enough.  

Tomas sat down on the ground and tugged on Marcus’ hand so he would join him. The grass obscured them from view, but there was no one to spy on them. There was a question in the dark blonde’s blue eyes. It was answered in the hazel irises in front of him.  

“Once upon a time—”  

“Marcus!”  

He barked out a huge laugh that shook his shoulders. It made Tomas smile broadly despite himself.  

“Don’t ever hide that laugh from me again.”  

“Never.” He paused. “So, you’re really ready to hear this?”  

“Yes. Are you ready to tell me?”  

“Yes. To be honest, it’s mostly gone already. The emotions, though, I still remember.”  

“Whatever you can share.” Tomas took both of his hands in his. “I’m here. You and me. As far as it goes.”  

“Nice to have you back.” There was a wry grin on Marcus’ lips.  

“Ditto.” He matched his partner’s grin. “Now tell me everything.” 


	10. Chapter 10

So, Marcus told Tomas every last thing he could recall. As promised, it wasn’t much. It didn’t matter. The younger man was fascinated and completely under his thrall. If he was disappointed there had been no white light or a voice telling him to walk toward it, Tomas kept it to himself. To be fair, he had never put much stock in those fairy tales. Heaven, to him, was more in line with what Marcus had described. A sensory experience, but not a visual one in the traditional sense.  

His hands never left Marcus’ the entire time. When words started to fail the older man, he would squeeze them to ground him. It was all it took for Marcus to resume speaking. When he was done, Tomas exhaled and then captured his love’s mouth with his own in a soft kiss. There was a lot of intent poured into that one action. Marcus understood it all and replied in kind.  

Afterward, he pressed his forehead against Tomas’, their hands still united. All talk had ceased. They stayed like that for some time. The only sounds were natural: the breeze on the leaves and grass, the occasional chirping of birds and their breathing. It was lovely and Zen. Just what they needed to center themselves after the self-inflicted chaos of the past few days.  

The thought of leaving never once entered their minds. They had just arrived at their own private oasis. It was too soon to think of such a thing. Besides, they still had work to do here. Yes, their connection had been re-established, but it was not yet secure. Until that time, this was where they would remain.  

“Walk with me?” Tomas asked some time later.  

What he really wanted to do was make love to Marcus in the tall grass; worship every inch of this beautiful man; this gift from God Himself. He wanted to pledge his undying to devotion to him and have him do the same unto him. This wasn’t the right time for such an act. So, Tomas did the next best thing. So long as they were together, what they did here mattered not.  

“Yes, please.” Marcus stood up and helped Tomas do the same.  

The path they took had no destination. It was all meadow as far as they could see. They weaved back and forth, this way and that, in various configurations without paying their movements much mind. All they could think about was each other. They stayed in step with each other. They purposely bumped into each other. They chased each other; took turns riding piggyback.   

(Marcus scoffed at first, but reconsidered when he saw Tomas lit from behind by the sun’s rays. Who was he to object riding his boyfriend around God’s backyard? He didn’t fare as well with Tomas on his back, but he managed.)   

The one constant was their joy. Their laughter could be heard echoing within their bubble.  

“I’m sorry I left you.” Marcus broached their most difficult subject once his feet were back on the ground as they caught their breath from Tomas carrying him on his back.  

“It’s okay. Truly.”   

Tomas didn’t need an apology. He appreciated it, but it wasn’t necessary. Not anymore. The stricken look on Marcus’ face made his heart twinge. He closed the gap between them and wrapped his arms around his boyfriend’s neck.   

“You are forgiven. You are redeemed. You are loved.”  

Those familiar words poured from Tomas’ lips, striking Marcus’ heart and stirring his soul. He felt his body warm as those sentiments reached their intended destinations. As his arms hooked around his partner’s waist, he tightened his embrace. He didn’t know how much he needed to hear him say those sentiments until now.   

Emotion swelled within them both as they each swallowed lumps in their throats. Marcus buried his face in the crook of Tomas’ neck, where it met the shoulder, and sobbed. The sounds he emitted and the way his body shook undid Tomas. He rubbed the back of the older man’s head, his fingers running through the too-short strands of hair. Tears ran down his cheeks, soaking the dark purple T-shirt Marcus wore.  

They clung to each other desperately. As far as they were concerned, they were the only two people in the universe who existed. Nothing else mattered outside of each other.  

“I’m sorry, querido. I should have been selfless, not selfish.”  

“Don’t you fuckin’ apologize. You were thinking of me.” Marcus pulled back enough so he could look into Tomas’ eyes, which were just as red and puffy as his. “No more apologies. We need to move past this, yeah?”  

Tomas nodded. He caressed his lover’s cheek. “I can think of one way.”  

“What? Here?”   

The idea made Marcus blanch. They were in God’s true house. Then, it occurred to him He saw all and He had a plan. Today, that plan featured Him as matchmaker for his two favorite fools in love. He brought them here so they could put aside their issues, and come together once and for all.   

Plus, it was the perfect way to close the door on the past and open a window to their future. Who was he to argue with such a grand design?  

“Here, querido.” Tomas kissed him, teasing Marcus’ mouth open with his tongue.  

He snaked his other arm around his boyfriend’s waist as the other man cupped the nape of his neck and mirrored him by wrapping his other arm around Tomas’ waist. They stood in the center of the meadow their heads going to and fro as their mouths captured and recaptured their mates. 

When they eventually broke apart so the oxygen could flow back into their deprived lungs, Marcus managed to finally respond. “Here is good.” A quick grin flashed as he stared into Tomas’ eyes. “Here is excellent.”  

He pulled the hem of the deep blue T-shirt out from where it had been tucked into Tomas’ jeans and tugged it over his head. It landed nearby, forgotten in the moment. The jeans were next, but the younger man went for Marcus’ own shirt first. Once it was similarly discarded, it wasn’t long before they were stark naked in their personal Garden of Eden.   

Both were taken aback as they took in each other. The beauty they saw humbled them and left them in awe. They had seen each other naked a lot since they took to the road post-Chicago, where it had all started. Even more since they became a couple. Each thought they had seen every inch of their lover, but only now, under God’s ever-watchful eye, did they understand that wasn’t true.  

Marcus ran his hands up Tomas’ arms, over his shoulders and clavicle, and down his chest. He carded his fingers through the dark chest hair and over the erect nipples. His hands glided over his boyfriend’s abs; a pinky tickled the belly button, making Tomas giggle. The older man avoided the lovely thick, hard cock, knowing there was plenty of time for that later.  

He walked behind Tomas, dragging his hand over the soft olive skin of the other man’s side, kissing his shoulder along the way, until it reached his back. There, he let both hands fall over every muscle until they reached that peach of an ass Marcus enjoyed so much. He squeezed both globes and grinned when he heard Tomas moan. As he pressed himself against his lover, his lips found the nape of his neck as he praised him.  

“You are so magnificent, luv. God broke the mold when he made you. I will never know what I did to deserve you. I honestly don’t care anymore. Just know I love you, and will honor and cherish you until I draw my true, final breath.”  

Tomas lolled his head back onto Marcus’ shoulder, reaching back to grip the back of his partner’s head. “I love you, baby. There never has been, is not now and never will be anyone else for me but you. Where you go, I go. I will forever honor and cherish you. You got it wrong, mi amor. You are the reason the mold broke that day. There is only one Marcus Keane and I am so blessed He chose me for you. That you think I am worthy of you.”  

He moaned when Marcus put his hand around his cock. Tomas’ hips grinded against his lover’s own erection as he placed his lips on other man’s temple. “Stroke me, Marcus. Just a little,” he panted.  

This wasn’t what he had in mind, but every meal has an appetizer, Marcus rationalized.     
   


	11. Chapter 11

“I know what you want, sweetheart. I’ve got you,” Marcus cooed as he slowly stroked Tomas.  

He enjoyed the grip the other man had on the back of his head. The grinding was quite nice, too. So nice, Marcus let out a moan of his own. This was just foreplay as far as he was concerned, not the main event.  

After a bit, Tomas put a hand over the one Marcus had on his cock. “Enough.”  

He turned around and sunk to the ground, pulling his lover along with him. On their knees, only their heads were visible above the tall grass. “Top or bottom?”  

Tomas had no preference. He wanted this to be Marcus’ decision because more than anything else, he wanted him to have whatever he wanted — especially in this most sacred of spaces. His body belonged to Marcus as he knew Marcus’ belonged to him.   

The dark blond couldn’t believe this wonderful man was giving him the choice of how they would make love in this moment. There had been zero hesitation, just a question. He had an answer; the only one he could ever give. “Bottom.”  

Having Tomas inside him was what he craved; to have that connection fully restored in this holy kingdom. The understanding he saw in the younger man’s eyes once he replied made his heart swell. He captured his lips in a sweet kiss, then lay on the ground and waited for Tomas to take him.  

That would come, but not just yet. Tomas didn’t get the chance to admire his love as he had been admired. He took Marcus’ left hand in both of his, his eyes resting on the naked wrist that once wore the very same leather cord with the Saint Benedict medal that now resided on his own right wrist. The small gun barrel tattoo was still there, a constant reminder of what he was despite the excommunication.  

Tomas kissed the tattoo, then turned the wrist over and placed his lips on the inside of it. Releasing that part of him, he parted Marcus’ legs, which were bent at the knees, and slotted himself between them. “You are so beautiful. You really are.”   

He was pleased Marcus didn’t look away at his praise. This was something he wanted him to know and believe.   

“In every way. You think no one sees you as anything but a gun. That is not true. Te veo, cariño. Te veo por lo que realmente eres y ese hombre....” His voice cracked as he got the words out. “Ese hombre es positivamente resplandeciente.”  

His eyes shined as brightly as Marcus’ did. He leaned down so he caught those soft lips with his own. The kiss deepened quickly as they held each other’s faces. The need never faded, despite the detachment of the past few days. Now it reignited deep inside them, threatening to consume them.  

They didn’t break until they had no other choice.   

The dark blonde lifted himself onto his elbows to watch Tomas’ dark head as the younger man teased his hole with his tongue, penetrating just enough so Marcus would moan and breathe out, “Tomas.”   

The younger man took the precome that was leaking from both their hard cocks and used it as lube. There was great pleasure in preparing Marcus. It had been too long since the last time they had sex.  

His eyes flicked up to meet his lover’s and he replaced his tongue with two of his fingers, scissoring them to stretch him out. He added a third, grinning like a Cheshire cat when Marcus began mewling like a hungry kitten.  

He came up and captured Marcus’ mouth in a searing kiss. As he replaced his fingers and slid himself inside him, their foreheads came together as they moaned in unison. Tomas slowly pushed his cock in all the way in to the hilt.  

“Yes, baby,” Marcus said breathlessly, falling back to the earth literally and figuratively. “God, I’ve missed you so much.”  

“I’ve missed you, too, mi amor.” He kissed him urgently, his tongue tangling with Marcus’. “Never again will we be parted.”  

Marcus thrusted his hips up toward Tomas, telling him want he wanted. The younger man pumped him with abandon as his lover met each one with equal fervor. Sweat began to form on their skin. With one hand on Tomas’ hip and their eyes locked, Marcus ran a hand down the other man’ chest. Then he gripped the back of his neck and pulled him into another deep kiss.  

Their moaning became louder and more primal as they continued. Marcus’ hands grabbed Tomas’ ass and pushed him even further in, helping his lover find his prostate. It worked. The cock hit it multiple times, forcing Marcus to wrap his legs around Tomas’ waist as he got close to the edge. His hands ran up Tomas’ back, looping over the other man’s shoulders.  

“I fucking love you,” he huffed out as he chased his orgasm.  

Tomas grinned. “I fucking love you, too.”  

He kissed the older man and sucked on his lower lip, moaning when he saw Marcus’ hand reach for his own cock. “Joder, Marcus. Espera por mí. Déjame hacer esto sólo una vez.”  

Spanish was all he could muster now his vision was beginning to blur at the edges. God bless this man. Tomas prayed he could be the man Marcus saw him as and that he wanted to be. One look at his beloved and he knew they were in this together. His orgasm was also close. He managed to suck the tip a few times before he tumbled over the edge.  

“Ven conmigo, nena. Ahora mismo.”  

Marcus nodded; words failed him, though his body more than made up the difference. A second later, he saw stars and everything else faded into nothing. Except Tomas, who he knew would always be there from now till the end of time and possibly beyond.  

Tomas had a similar experience, only he saw white. There was no vision. There was nothing, except Marcus. He grounded him in a way no other had nor would. They were in this together and nothing would rip them apart. As God _was_ their witness, Tomas was confident they had nothing to fear.  

He fell on to Marcus, exhausted and satiated. There was no way he could move and he had no desire to do so. The feel of Marcus’ lips on the top of his head made him smile. His baby was with him and all was right in the world.  


	12. Chapter 12

“This might sound strange considering where we are,” Marcus admitted some time later, “but I’m rather looking forward to getting out of here.”  

They were still laying naked amid the tall grass of the meadow. Time had slowed to a point where neither man had any sense of it. Had a few minutes passed? An hour? A day? It mattered while at the same time, it didn’t. It was immaterial. The warm rays of the sun heated their skin comfortably.  

Tomas had moved so he was nestled next to Marcus with his head on the dark blond’s chest. Their arms and legs were so tangled together, it was hard to tell where one ended and the other began. The younger man had a hand resting on his lover’s flaccid cock, his eyes raised to the bluest sky he had ever seen.  

He hummed in response. Marcus chuckled. The older man put his lips on top of Tomas’ head, leaving a kiss within the dark curls. He inhaled as he did so, enjoying the scent that came with it. Motel shampoo to be sure, but also something that was unmistakably Tomas. Nothing would please Marcus as much as figuring out what made his boyfriend smell so wonderful. However, he enjoyed the mystery too much to press it.  

“I can’t wait to start our life together,” Tomas told him. “We’ll handle whatever gets thrown our way. We are one.”  

His hand moved away from Marcus’ cock and up to his sternum. He left a kiss over his love’s heart. Then adjusted himself so he could look into the blue eyes that were set within that lovely, no longer careworn face.   

“‘When I was a child, I spoke as a child, I understood as a child, I thought as a child: but when I became a man, I put away childish things.’"  

“First Corinthians,” Marcus cited as he carded his hand through Tomas’ hair. The earnest besotted look on that exquisite bearded face warmed his heart. He had no doubts that look was mirrored on his own face. “It has been a privilege to watch you become the man you are today, Tomas. You are the best person I know. Strong, stubborn as hell, empathic. You have such a big heart and the purest soul.”  

“Sounds like someone I know.” Tomas leaned in and caught Marcus’ mouth in a tender kiss. He loved how soft the lips were of this warrior of God. They reflected the man within rather well. “Every word you used to describe me just now, I second for you. I see you, Marcus.”  

“You’re the only one who does, luv.” He kissed him back, running his tongue along the other man’s bottom lip after. “Just the way I like it. I see you, too.”  

Tomas smiled. “Just the way I like it.”  

He climbed on top of his lover, the need to be as physically close to him as possible too strong to ignore anymore. His hands slid into place on either side of Marcus’ face as his lover placed his own on Tomas’ hips. Lips left their mark on the dark blond’s forehead, eyelids, cheeks, tip of his nose and chin before taking their rightful place between Marcus’ own.  

Tilting his head back, Marcus exposed his long, sensuous neck to Tomas for the taking. He smiled when his lover took to it like a cat to cream. His hands floated along the other man’s back, trailing occasionally down to cup his ass.   

The long moan that came from Tomas when he reached his ass caused Marcus to give it a loving smack. This led to Tomas grinding against him as he licked and sucked Marcus’ neck. Upping the ante, the dark blond took both their cocks in his hand and stroked them as one.  

“Fuck, Marcus,” Tomas moaned as he ran a hand over his boyfriend’s short hair. “Eres demasiado bueno conmigo.”  

“Sólo devolviendo el favor, mi amor.”  

Tomas pulled back so he was staring at Marcus, which caused the other man to still his hand. “I love you, Marcus. You are it for me. I am all in.”

“I love you, Tomas.” Marcus released them, putting his hand on his boyfriend’s heart as his free hand rested on the other man’s hip. “If there is only one thing you know about me for certain, know that. You are the greatest gift I ever could have received. I’m with you as far as this goes.”  

A grin played on Tomas’ lips as he put his hand over the one that lay on his chest. “I am blessed to be able to unwrap you whenever I want.”  

“Whenever _you_ want, eh? I don’t factor in at all?” An equally deviant grin spread across Marcus’ face.  

“You can unwrap me whenever you want, baby.”  

The older man pushed himself up into a seated position as Tomas wrapped his legs around Marcus’ waist and cupped his hands around the back of his neck. Marcus left a trail of kisses along Tomas’ clavicle as the other man tilted his head back.   

“I’ll definitely be taking advantage of that.”  

He teased his tongue between Tomas’ lips, seeking entrance and was granted. Tomas didn’t have to knock. Marcus opened his mouth eagerly. Their tongues resumed their dance, twirling their way around the insides of their mouths as if in a waltz. The music ended eventually, as it always did.   

“Let’s go for a walk,” Marcus suggested, nuzzling his lover’s neck.  

“Like this?” Tomas was both horrified and seriously considering the notion.  

Marcus chuckled. “I was thinking we could get dressed, but if you want to continue the Adam and Eve aesthetic…”  

“You are incorrigible!” Tomas nipped at Marcus’ neck. He teethed on the other man’s ear lobe, then added, “And I prefer Adam and Adam.”  

A soft moan floated out of Marcus. “Noted. Time to get up, Adam.”  

Tomas stole another kiss before untangling himself from his lover. “As you wish, Adam.”  

They got dressed slowly, silently lamenting the actions. A glance here and there at each other as each item once more found its place on their respective bodies threatened to slow their progress. In the end, the clothes and boots were back on before they once more found solace in each other’s arms.  

After a few deep yet tender kisses, Marcus took Tomas’ hand and led him slowly through the meadow. Moving again felt good. Although nothing felt better than having his boyfriend by his side as they enjoyed every second in this oasis. He slung an arm around Tomas’ neck, his arm hanging down the other man’s chest.  

Tomas leaned into Marcus when the older man slung his arm around him. He also took the hand that dangled over his chest in his and slid his other arm around the back of Marcus’ waist.   

This was real. They felt like a real couple. They _were_ a real couple. Tomas thought his heart was going to burst, he was so happy. He pressed his lips to Marcus’ temple and smiled when Marcus returned the gesture.  

There was a sweetness in the air that rivaled what hung between them. Tomas suggested finding some fruit once they were back on the road. Marcus agreed, liking they both had the same hankering. They ambled through the tall grass. Words were kept to a minimum. Some moments didn’t need anything extra.  

Eventually, Marcus asked, “What should be the first thing we do as a couple? Saving Bennett, notwithstanding.”  

“Go on a proper date.”  

“Didn’t even hesitate. I like a man who knows what he wants.” His hand had since left Tomas’ top half and was now happily situated in one of his back pockets.  

“And what do you want?” Tomas knew the answer before Marcus replied.  

“You. God. And Bennett saved.” A grin appeared that didn’t fully reach his eyes. “Mostly in that order.”  

“We will get Bennett back, mi amor. Integration isn’t the be all, end all we thought it was. He’s as stubborn as you are. It’s not over yet.” Tomas had slid the hand around Marcus’ waist into one of the other man’s back pockets, as well.  

“His sister. That’s how they nearly got him back in Chicago. But I was there then to bring him back. This time, he had no one and I know damn well that’s how they did it this time, too.”  

Tomas kissed his cheek.  

“Fucking buzzkill, I am.” The dark blond gave a mirthless chuckle. “I’m ruining the happiest place on earth.”  

The younger man stood in front of Marcus and put his hand on his chest. “You are not ruining anything. Your concern for your friend only enhances this place. Remember, this is one of the reasons why I love you. You are not the mess you think you are.”  

“I think I’m a pretty hot mess, actually.” This time, the grin did reach his eyes.  

A wide smile spread across Tomas’ lips. “Scorching. Eres un hombre maravilloso. Te amo, lunático.”  

“Hot, crazy _and_ beautiful. I had no idea I was the complete package. You are extremely lucky to have landed me at all.”   

Marcus started walking away, but Tomas grabbed him from behind. He pulled the older man tightly to him, his hands pressed against Marcus’ torso.   

“It’s not luck when God is your matchmaker,” Tomas said in his ear. “Although, let’s be fair. It is _you_ who hit the jackpot with _me_. I’m young, handsome—”  

“Someone has a rather high opinion of himself.”  

“—and extremely patient when it comes to temperamental older men.”  

That got a laugh out of Marcus. Tomas smiled into the nape of his boyfriend’s neck, his shoulders shaking.  

After another minute, they resumed walking; now hand-in-hand.  

“So, about this date….”  

“Dinner and dancing,” Tomas told him. “I want to hold you in my arms on a dance floor as the music washes over us.”  

“That sounds wonderful. Only don’t let these long legs fool you. I’m no Fred Astaire.”  

Tomas went a few steps ahead, his hand still holding Marcus’. He turned around as he walked backwards and gave him an appraising look. “Oh, I don’t know. I think you are quite graceful. For some reason, I think you were a ballet dancer in a past life.”  

Marcus shot him a look. “I think this place is doing your brain in.”  

The most dazzling smile exploded over Tomas’ face. It took his boyfriend’s breath away when he saw it. Maybe it was the sun was sitting lower in the sky and the brilliant blue from which it hung was beginning to fade, but Marcus would swear on a stack of Bibles wrapped in rosaries that his golden-skinned lover was glowing from within.  

A warmth bloomed over Tomas’ cheeks. So much so, he wondered if they were on fire. He didn’t know if he would ever get used to the way his man was gazing at him just now. Adoringly, as though he had never seen anyone quite like him before.  

 _I know I’ve never seen anyone like you. Love of my life. Is it too soon to say that? Probably._ He regarded the gangly fellow before him. _Maybe. You feel the same. Don’t you, mi_ _amor_ _?_   

The gap between them was closed before he realized it. Marcus stood inches away from face. At some point, he had slipped his hand behind Tomas’ neck.  

“Are you with me, luv?”  

“Always. Just got lost in the sight of you is all.”  

Now, it was Marcus’ turn to blush. It took a bit of strength not to turn his focus from Tomas, but he ignored the instinct that had been ingrained in him since birth. He was going to drink in every last drop of the love and praise this amazing man would give him. Call it a hunch, but Marcus suspected there was going to be plenty more from where that came.   

 _You’re going to bask in this light of_ _mine,_ _of ours, aren’t you, beautiful boy? It’s all for you. You are my everything. Probably shouldn’t say that bit. No. I should tell you. I_ **_will_ ** _tell you._   

Time was running out for their bubble if the lowering sky was any indication. Tomas took advantage of the sands falling through their hourglass to broach a topic that had been in his thoughts since he had left Nachburn Island, Washington.  

“I met Peter.”  

A softness that was different from the one he wore a moment ago stole across Marcus’ features. “I’m glad. Wonderful man.”  

Peter Osborne was someone whom Marcus had connected with while he and Tomas had been investigating a series of horrific incidents tied into the island’s past, including what led to Andy’s possession.  

Marcus and Tomas had been at a crossroads at the time with the younger man tapping into his headstrong nature and innate stubbornness. He had told Marcus a lot of things then, among them that the older man was jealous of him and he didn’t need his tutelage anymore.  

The wedge between them, as well as the one between him and God, had Marcus feeling adrift. During his solo investigations, he had met Peter. They hit it off immediately. The exorcist had no idea he was capable of being desired by another soul.  

What cemented their bond, however, was Peter being a kindred spirit. Like Marcus, he had been to hell and back due to his stint overseas in the military. He had seen a lot of dark and depraved things that left a psychic residue. Being so close to death was hard to shake off.  

Their mutual darkness and willingness to push it back — to let the light in — gave Marcus something he had been lacking for years: a friend. Peter helped Marcus have an emotional breakthrough. They shared a few snogs that reminded the dark blonde he did, indeed, have an active libidio, but duty called and nothing more came of it.  

Andy’s possession became his focus, as did making sure social worker Rose Cooper and Andy’s foster children, Verity, Shelby, Caleb, Truck and Harper were all safe. Tomas and Marcus were able to ensure everyone’s safety but Andy’s. At least, his soul was saved. It wasn’t a total loss in that respect. Nonetheless, his passing left its mark.  

“He seemed very fond of you,” Tomas admitted. “I hadn’t realized you two were so close. I … hadn’t realized a lot of things while we were with Andy, Rose and the kids. So much I didn’t understand or told myself I didn’t. Then when you left, I understood everything … too late. Or so I had thought.”  

The younger man squeezed Marcus’ hand and brought his own free hand to the other man’s cheek. “I’m glad he was there for you when I was not. My stubborn pride put a distance between us that I never wanted yet couldn’t prevent.”  

Marcus leaned into the touch. “We got there in the end, yeah? Chalk it up to growing pains. Every relationship has them or so I’m told. Peter was an important touchstone in my own emotional and spiritual evolution. I will be forever grateful to him.”  

A shy smile spread across Tomas’ face. “Yeah, we did. The road to true love never runs smooth, right?”  

Their lips met briefly. “Exactly,” Marcus breathed against his boyfriend’s mouth. “I am yours and yours alone.”  

Tomas let out a shaky breath. “Love of my life. How I have waited for thee.”  

The next kiss exploded every cell within them. Senses were heightened. Hearts ballooned in size. Souls reached across the divide to find and become one with their mates. The world around them ceased to exist. For those long moments, time stretched out till everything slowed to a stop.   

When they parted, it all snapped back into place. Both men were shook by the experience. They pulled each other into an embrace that was cathartic and reassuring. Whatever that was … whatever had just happened … it was healing. Slowly it occurred to them it was a parting gift from God. Not that He was leaving them, but that it was time for them to leave.  

He would forever be with them in all ways. By their side and in their hearts, He would always have a presence in their lives. It was, perhaps, the greatest gift of all. Though the men would be hard pressed to rank it higher than the one where they found each other despite all the static that had tried to keep them apart.  

The decision to walk back to the SUV was silent yet mutual. Hand in hand, they left the meadow and followed the path, which had since reappeared, directly to where they had started. So much had changed since they had arrived that morning. The air was clear. Their love was real. It was all easier.  

Between them, at least.  

However, the clouds were beginning to roll in. Bennett was still out there wreaking havoc, now he had integrated. Mouse was on his trail. She lost it once, but she wouldn’t let that happen twice. It was only a matter of time before she called them to get their asses to God knows where.  

But that wasn’t now.  

Now, Marcus pinned Tomas against the side of the vehicle and licked his way into his lover’s mouth. It took no real effort, as that plush mouth opened almost instantly. Tomas slid his hands around the other man’s hips. He grabbed his ass and pulled him in as close as possible.   

Tomas’ mouth left Marcus’, which earned a moan from the dark blond. His lips didn’t go far, though. They peppered his neck all the way down till that sweet spot where it meets the shoulder. Then, Tomas buried his nose there, inhaling that wonderfully musky scent that was one hundred percent Marcus.   

The older man tilted his head back, eyes closed, so his love could have better access. He sighed as he rubbed Tomas’ back. When he lowered his gaze, he found himself staring into those hazel eyes. There was a spot of fear mingled with the concern and love. The future was unknown and terrifying.  

“You ready for this?” Marcus asked.  

“Yes.”  

“Think I can drive for a change?”  

Tomas narrowed his eyes. “I’m fine. I haven’t had a vision since Micah’s room.”  

“Actually, I was referring to your rubbish driving, but you make a point with the visions.”   

A slap to his ass made him wince. When his lips puckered, Tomas took advantage. “I’m a good driver. Got your sorry ass to the motel and here, didn’t I?”  

“So, is that a ‘no?'”  

“Fuck off,” Tomas replied, pushing Marcus away playfully.  

“I guess someone’s feeling better. Even developed a potty mouth.”   

The wicked grin that appeared on the older man’s lips made his boyfriend’s heart tighten, as well has the crotch of his jeans. Reluctantly, Tomas tossed him the keys he dug out of his front pocket.  

“Think we can find a motel room before dark?” Marcus asked as he walked around the SUV to the driver’s side.  

Once they were both inside, Tomas shrugged. “If not, maybe we can find some place to sleep out under the stars. It would be a nice change.”  

The engine roared to life. “It would indeed. Maybe even a campground with a cabin, if we could swing it.”  

“Don’t tease me, querido.”  

Marcus laughed as they buckled their seatbelts and he pulled out onto the empty road. Tomas placed his hand on his boyfriend’s thigh as they drove. For the next hundred miles or so, demons, possessions and the like were not a concern. Finding a good song on the radio was the top priority.   

When The Tomangoes’ “I Really Love You” came on, Marcus let loose an exuberant, “Yessssss!” smacked Tomas’ hand from the dial and cranked up the volume. No surprise, he knew every word to the Northern soul classic.  

Then food took the honors as both men’s stomachs were rumbling loudly. Lots of sex and little breakfast would do that. Once they found a diner and nearly put themselves in a food coma, they learned a motel was right down the street.  

For the first time ever, they got a room with a single, king-sized bed.  

They slept for a day and a half.  

Nude.  

Enough time had been wasted as far as they were concerned. 


End file.
